Each week, Dr Kirstin Ferguson tackles questions on workplace, career and leadership in her advice column, “Got a Minute?” This week: a denied holiday, a bully for a boss and being held back by a job title.

I put my annual leave request form in before another employee, but their leave was approved and mine wasn’t. The other employee gave some personal reasons for needing to take leave, but I wasn’t asked a reason, so didn’t give one. Is this right and fair?

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The lack of a clear process for who gets leave and when is what has caused the issue here. It sounds like your boss has assumed the reason your colleague gave was more important than your reason, but did so without even bothering to ask. Your colleague may have an excellent reason to take annual leave. However, that doesn’t excuse your boss from treating your leave request with equal respect and at least asking why you want to take leave. Your boss needs to find a fair solution.

Your employer cannot refuse your request for leave unless it is reasonable to do so, and to be reasonable it needs to be a genuine, sound business reason. I think you have to speak with your boss and understand why your leave has been refused, given you followed the process. I would explain you lodged your request first, and if you had been given the opportunity to give your reasons for taking leave, you would have offered it. If your boss wants to find a fair solution, they would be best to see how they can allow both you and your colleague to go on leave since the error in the process in this instance has been theirs, not yours. I also think your boss needs to establish a transparent and fair leave process, so everyone knows how leave requests are assessed. Do you need to provide a reason every time you apply for leave? Does it matter if you get your request in first, or are requests always assessed on the reason given instead? A new process will ensure this kind of problem doesn’t happen again.

I work for the government and have endured bullying and harassment from my manager for the past 18 months. Despite following protocol and filing a grievance, HR and my director did nothing, and now I’m facing retaliation. My colleagues supported my claims, but still no action was taken. I’m struggling to find a new role in this tough market, with only one interview after 20 applications. Financially, I can’t afford to quit. I’m stuck, overwhelmed, and on the verge of a panic attack. Please help – I don’t know what to do.

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I am so sorry this has happened to you. It sounds like a terrible experience, and I am not surprised you are struggling given all that has happened. I can only imagine you are keen to leave and find a new job so you can make a fresh start.

First things first, your mental health needs to be your priority. You will be better placed to find a new role when you are back to feeling yourself. I wonder if you can take this opportunity to access any support your workplace offers? Can you obtain psychological support through an EAP service, or see your doctor, who may support some medical leave for stress? If you can find a way to access paid leave from work to recover you will be able to deal with your next steps and whatever the future holds much more easily.