Each week, Dr Kirstin Ferguson tackles questions on the workplace, career and leadership in her advice column “Got a Minute?” This week: letting go a long-term employee, a manager holding a grudge after a bad review and a rude coworker going through issues at home.

I’m a small business owner with a dilemma. I have only two employees, and one has been with us a little longer than the other. I’m experiencing a significant downturn and have been avoiding the inevitable of having to let someone go, hoping work will pick up, as letting someone go feels very personal. I feel it is probably time for the person with the longer employment to move on and get experience elsewhere, but as they are quite entrenched, I worry it will be difficult for them to see this. Any advice?

It is never easy to let someone go but the sooner you are honest with this person, the better.

I would explain the brutal facts: the business simply can’t support the two roles in the team, and as a result, you will no longer be needing her role. They will ask about the other person so have your reasons clear about why this role needs to go and not the other one. Try to focus on the role rather than the individual. I would acknowledge this must be a shock but reinforce how much you have valued their work and want to support their future career. If you plan to give a reference to any potential future employer, I would mention that too.

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These conversations are never easy, and the person may become upset, angry or shocked. Whatever happens, you just need to remain calm, fact-based and supportive as they work through what you are saying. Also have as much information with you as possible. For example, when do you want them to finish? If they want to finish earlier than that, can they? And will you pay them out? What are their financial entitlements? They might ask whether they are entitled to a redundancy (they are not since you have less than 15 employees), so have all that information on hand. Good luck.

I am stuck in a rut with my manager. We always got on very well until another team member raised an anonymous and detailed complaint about her, and she received a negative 360 review. I suspect she believes I’m behind the complaint. She told me I need to look for a new job because I have been in the team too long but does not cite performance issues. Apart from her, I love the job and as I’m close to retirement have no desire to find a new one.

Your manager sounds incredibly difficult to work with, and it is a shame she didn’t treat the feedback in the 360 review as it is intended, which is as a personal development tool. It is also incredibly poor form to be trying to hunt down anyone who puts in a complaint.

You probably know already you could raise this within your organisation since her behaviour is completely unacceptable. But I get the sense you just want to bide your time until retirement, which I also understand. If that is the case, there really isn’t much that will change this manager’s behaviour. It sounds like her boss needs to be dealing with this much more actively than they are and so you might want to consider letting them know what is going on.