Someone, quick, please explain why Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex’s strawberry jam is giving me the irrits. So het up am I that even my favourite powdered collagen being on sale has been no balm.

To recap for those who may not be across why a jar of jam went viral, the Duchess of Domesticity unveiled it as the first product in her American Riviera Orchard – I know, so excellent – line. In jars labelled in a run of 50, nestled in clay bowls amid lemons and flowers, the jam was dispatched to influencer friends.

If said friends were unsure what to do with something sugary that’s usually slathered on carbs, they kept their composure admirably. Actually, that’s not true. They lost their minds, sharing photos of the jam with love-wins social media messages to their girl “M”.

Former Suits co-star Abigail Spencer (jar No.6) beamed rapturously in her garden, jam clasped to her bosom like an infant rescued from an earthquake site. Spencer’s expression was akin to what you’d look like if someone had sent you a $5 million Net-a-Porter voucher, or you had won Wimbledon for the first time at age 57.

“This jam is my jam. A delicious taste of what’s to come … love you so M,” Spencer wrote on Insta. Actor Mindy Kaling got jar 19: “Obsessed,” she posted.

Gawd.

While the OTT reactions to being given a school fete staple tickled my fancy, overall Meghan’s jam made me scratchy. Any mental health professionals out there – or just anyone with, say, a sense of perspective – feel free to chip in now. Meanwhile, here’s my take.

Jam is not a croquembouche. It’s not knowledge sharing. But judging by Meghan’s preview video for American Riviera Orchard, she sees being able to put flowers into vases or cook from scratch as rare and powerful juju. She’s trying to elevate everyday chores to aspirational rich lady skills.